Ancestral Rites
Invoke their blessings for the marriage
"The atma is neither born nor does it die at any time, nor having been, will it cease to exist again. It is unborn, eternal, permanent, and primeval. The Atma is not destroyed when the body is destroyed."
- Lord Krishna, Bhagvad Gita.
Hindu beliefs thus encourage the worship of our ancestors though they may no longer be amongst us. The belief in the Eternal Spirit is among the most important tenets of every religion in the world. It makes mortality easier to accept and gives us a sense of retaining a link with those who have passed away. Even though their physical presence is gone, we believe they protect us and bless us and so remain alive for us.
Several communities perform specific rites and rituals to seek the blessings of ancestors not only because it is auspicious to do so but also because it is an affirmation of spiritual acceptance.
Bihari Kayasth's perform the Ghidhari ancestral worship to invoke their blessings for the marriage. This is a day of fasting for the bride, her parents, uncles and aunts. The pujari or priest offers prayers to all the deities and then to the ancestors seeking their blessings for the union. The bride is required to sit between her parents during the puja.
Pind-daan or offering of ground rice is made to the ancestors. The bride's mother and other sumangalis (married ladies) grind the rice before the puja. On completion of the ghidhari puja the bride's parents ask their elders for their blessings by touching their feet.
Parsis set aside two days, known as Varadh Patra, when religious ceremonies are performed in honour of their dead ancestors. The third and fourth days of the wedding celebrations are known as varadh patra days. The prayers said on these days are known as satum and baj and are performed in the Agiary or Parsi Fire Temple. In this manner the dead and beloved are being invited to attend the wedding.
The Tamil Chettiar community performs the Padaipu. Also known as Koodai Akki Unmuthal this ritual is performed in honour of the ancestors. Food is cooked and offered to the ancestors and then eaten by family members.
Amongst Tamil Iyer Brahmins the Vratham ceremony is observed to invoke the blessings of all their ancestors and pray for their intervention in removing those obstacles that threaten to disrupt the wedding proceedings. This ceremony is performed separately for the bride and groom at the marriage venue. The rituals followed for the groom are far more elaborate than those for the bride. Sacred yellow thread is tied on the wrists of the bride and groom and they are not permitted to leave the marriage venue. The palika ceremony (sprinkling of nine varieties of grains) for the prosperity of the couple's new life together is conducted simultaneously with the vratham. To culminate the function, an aarthi is performed.
Traditional Assamese weddings require the invocation of all relatives for the past seven generations during a ceremony. The invocation is called sradh and may be performed either on the day of the wedding or one day before.
In Uttar Pradesh, there are two versions of the ceremony. One of them is called the tanee kadai where bhog is prepared in a kadai under a red cloth tied with mauli, the holy thread, and is offered to ancestors. The other version is called pitron ki puja and is performed along with the navgriha ki puja. Here bhog is made and offered to ancestors in an earthen pot. After the puja, it is sealed with dough and left near the lamp at the mandir in the house. Once the wedding is over the earthen pot is emptied in the river Ganges and then kept safely for at least the first year.
Amongst Bengalis the Vridhi ceremony is about offering puja to the ancestors of the bride and the groom, performed a day before the marriage attended by all the family members. Alpana or rangoli is done and on it is placed a ghot with amra pallab. All the samagri or items for the puja are arranged in a baran dala (a silver plate) with a 'Sri' symbol made on it. The purohit brings an idol of Bhagwan Narayan to the puja. The idol is worshipped by lighting incense and lamps. The vridhi is usually performed by a paternal uncle. Tradition demands that the uncle and the bride / groom be on a liquid diet.
Whatever the ceremony the motive is the same: to seek the blessings of those departed and show respect to the past generations and our heritage.
